Praying for a miracle

IVF:

A lot has happened since last post. I started another IVF attempt on July 1st. I did not go on birth control this time. I responded better; although not like a 20 year or even a 30 year old. I had a retrieval on July 14th. Dr. Bohler retrieved 5 eggs....3 mature. We had 2 transferred.....1 B8 cell and 1 B5 cell.

I started brown spotting on July 24th. My beta was July 28th and my # was 54. Yvonne told me I was pregnant. I had hoped my #'s were higher and had a sick feeling that something wasn't right. I tried so hard to be happy and enjoy this but I just couldn't get past the bad feeling. I prayed so hard for this little baby. My beta on July 30th was 67 and didn't double as it should. I was devastated. My birthday was the next day and looking back at the pictures on my birthday, I could see the sadness in my eyes. It's so hard to look at those pictures now. Just thinking about it brings tears to my eyes. I don't understand why God didn't answer our prayers.

On Friday 8/1, Yvonne said you will be having a miscarriage and expect a period in the next few days. After a little over a week, I called Yvonne because I hadn't started yet. They did another beta and it was in the 700's. I had a ultrasound and nothing was there. I went back a few days later and they found an empty sac. I had a blighted ovum. After several more blood test and ultrasounds, I had a d & c on August 28th.

We are going to take a break from IVF until next spring. I've rejoined Weight Watchers with my mom and hoping to lose some weight before our Hawaii trip in January with my husband and in-laws.


ADOPTION:

Our fingerprints expire in November, so we will have to renew at that time. Our homestudy and I71H expires next June. My thoughts and prayers are with Lauren.

I'm glad the Olympics are over and hoping there will be a speed up very soon.

No eggs

I went for egg retrieval and there were NO eggs. I was prepared for the worst so it did surprise me too much.

I saw my RE yesterday and he said to wait a cycle or two, then he'll try a different protocol for me. He said I have diminished ovarian reserve.

So for the next 2 months, I'll enjoy not having to do shots, labs, ultrasounds, etc.

Retrieval set for Thursday

I'm still not responding great but I have 2 and may be 3 follicles. The chances are not great but nothing is too hard for God. We are praying for God's will. I go in at 8:15 on Thursday for retrieval. I pray we can at least transfer 1.

Still on shots

I went Tuesday for another ultrasound and more blood work. My e2 went to 134 which isn't great. I had 2 maybe 3 follicles which isn't great.

My RE decided since IVF is covered by insurance then we should go ahead and try with what we have. I'm still on the shots.

I go back to RE for more blood work and another ultrasound on Friday (4/18).

I'm still praying and believing for a miracle!

More bad news.

More bad news today. My right ovary is not responding. My left ovary is responding but not enough to do IVF. My two options were to cancel the IVF or give 2 more days. I've decided to do 2 more days and see what happens. If we do not do IVF this cycle, we will try IUI.

I am incredibly sad. I was hoping for more follicles. I go back Tuesday morning for bloodwork and ultrasound again.

Very Sad :(

I received bad news on Wednesday. I found out my body is not responding to the medicine. I was devastated and heart broken. My RE has increased my follistim to 300 am & pm, and added Menopur 75 once in the evening. Yvonne (IVF Coordinator) was so sweet. She even cried when the dr told her my bad news.

I go back to the RE on Sunday at 7:45 to see if my body is responding now. I was told to prepare for the RE to cancel my IVF.

I am thanking God for the trial and praising God for the miracle & blessing!

Mock Transfer and First shot

I went this morning for the ultrasound and E2 bloodwork. The ultrasound looked great. No signs of cysts. While waiting for my mock transfer under anesthesia, the IVF coordinator came in and said blood work looked great.

I then had the mock transfer done. I was a nervous wreck. I was shaking uncontrollably and very cold. My mom and I stressed to the anesthesiologists that I have a sensitive stomach to anesthetic and he loaded me up with anti-nauseas medicine. Thankfully, I did not get sick! The drs dilated my cervix and opened wide enough so in several weeks when I have my transfer it won't close back up so quick (hopefully).

I am so thankful for my mom taking me since my husband had to work. I sure missed my husband though.

At 6:00 tonight, my husband gave me my first micro-dose lupron shot. He did great! He is nervous that he's going to hurt me. I told him though I don't trust anyone but him to give me the shots.

Thank you to Jesus for great bloodwork, ultrasound and mock transfer!

Mock Transfer set for 4/2

I'm having my mock transfer tomorrow under anesthesia. The doctors will dilate my cervix.

I'm also having my baseline E2 bloodwork and ultrasound done. My husband has to work so my mother will be taking me.

My baby brother, Jerry, came home last week and we were able to meet his girlfriend. We had so much fun and it was so great to see Jerry again. I think it did my Mom and Dad alot of good to see him and meet his girlfriend. We really liked her. She was so friendly and very easy to talk to.

Here's a picture of my mom, Jerry, and me:

Discouraged

I went today for my mock transfer. The IVF drs were out of town at a seminar so Dr. Archer was the only one in today. There were problems. She had trouble finding the opening of my cervix. She thought since I had surgery 3 weeks ago that it should not have been a problem. After 1/2 hour of trying, she decided it best to wait until the IVF doctors return and put me under anesthesia and dilate my cervix.

This makes me nervous and discouraged. I'm concerned that something may be wrong. I'm concerned that at the actual transfer something may go wrong.

We just can't seem to catch a break. We have run into problems after problems with the IVF. Thankfully, up to this point the problems have been resolved eventually. Please pray that the mock transfer will go okay.

I also received my medicine. It's a little frightening!

IVF Packet

The nurse ordered my IVF medicines on Monday for them to be delivered on Thursday to my work. Kind of nervous to see how much medicine I will have to take.

I received in the mail today a packet from the Fertility Center. I go to the center on April 2nd for an ultrasound, E2 and P4. If the tests are normal, I will take the first dose of micro-dose lupron that night. My estimated Egg Retrieval is the week of April 14th.

After reading the packet and seeing how many injections I will probably have, I became nervous. I know after I see the all the syringes and needles tomorrow, I'll be really nervous.

I just need to trust in God and pray for strength and His will. Thanks to those who have prayed for us. We really appreciate them!

Ready to start IVF #1

I had my appointment with RE Friday. I rode the elevator with him. He asked how I was and I told him I was great. He asked: Are you ready to get started? I said: I hope so!

After meeting with him in the office, he said I had a D&C and was pretty covered with polyps. Could this be the reason we couldn't get pregnant? No way to tell for sure.

He told me to call the nurse and let her know I'm ready to start the IVF. I called the nurse before I left their parking lot and left her a voice mail. She left me a voice mail stating she needs to talk to RE first to see if he wants to change my protocol since I had surgery, etc. If nothing changes, I'll start the shots April 2nd! I am to call Yvonne (nurse) on Monday at 10:00. So we are praying and waiting.

Update

I must apologize for not posting more. I just haven't felt like talking about the adoption. I feel very frustrated and down about how long it is taking. I don't expect a referral for 3 more years.

BIG NEWS and Prayers Requested!!!! I went on Chad's insurance effective January 1st. Chad works for a great company and has excellent health insurance. It will cover 3 in-vitro attempts in a lifetime. I was anxious about getting started.

1/8/08 - went for RE consultation appointment
1/22 - started taking BCP
1/29/08 - went for SIS ultrasound. Polyps were found and surgery scheduled for 2/27. I was very sad. I had no idea I had polyps. The IVF is delayed until polyps are removed.
2/27 - had the flu and could not have the surgery.
3/5 - hysterscopy d&c to remove the polyps. My uterus was completely covered in polyps according to the RE. I'm not sure he did a d&c. The recovery nurse said I had a d&c. My parents took me since my husband had to work. Mom saw the before and after pics and she said RE just said he cleaned my uterus.

I was advised to start taking the BCP Monday. My post-op appointment is Friday 14th. I'll find out then if I have to wait a month before starting the IVF. I really hope we can get started right away!

Please pray that I have a baby very soon! I seem to have alot of bad "infertility" days and get down very easy. It seems our office is full of grandmothers or expecting grandmothers. Our church is full of babies. I want so bad to be a mother and for my husband to be a father.

I feel very blessed that God has given my husband such a great job with excellent insurance. We are so thankful to God for what He has done and is going to do in our lives! To God be the Glory!

Here are some pictures of our sweet little furbabies!